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The Courage to be Free

Written by Mariani Ng Posted in Mariani Ng on Monday, 13 November 2017.

If you want to become whole, let yourself be partial.
If you want to become straight, let yourself be crooked.
If you want to become full, let yourself be empty.
If you want to be reborn, let yourself die.
If you want to be given everything, give everything up.
Tao Te ching #22, lau Tzu –

 

The courage to be free ?

 

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Bebas memiliki banyak arti, dari berbagai sudut pandang. Di sini, saya ingin melihat dari sudut pandang sikap dan pikiran kita. 

Apakah kita sudah bebas?

Sederhana, lihat saja pada sikap kita sehari-hari. 

Apakah kita sudah bebas dari kata ’menyesal’ dalam diri ini?

Apakah kita sering merasa terjerat dalam sikap dan perilaku yang tidak kita inginkan, tapi kita lakukan juga?

Apakah kita bebas berpikir apa saja, melakukan apa saja, tanpa terjerat oleh perasaan? Tanpa terjerat oleh kecerdasan diri sendiri?

 

 

When Things Get Difficult

Written by L. Michael Hall, Ph.D Posted in L. Michael Hall, Ph.D. on Thursday, 05 October 2017.

From: L. Michael Hall

2017 Morpheus Reflections #42

October 4, 2017

 

Things can, and do, often become difficult.  Surely you know that and have had that experience. So let’s explore that.   First, what does that mean?  It could mean a number of things.

  1. It could mean that you are going to have to put forth more effort and energy into what you’re doing if you are going to succeed.  The difficulty is the effort that you have to expend and if you are already tired, demotivated, or lacking vitality, then the sense of difficulty increases.  In this case, the problem that’s “difficult” is your basic energy level and sense of vitality.
  2. It could mean that you are going to have to do some things that you do not want to do.  You have done what’s easy or fun, now comes the difficult part— getting yourself to engage in those actions that you do not like doing, do not want to do, do not enjoy doing.  Perhaps you feel “uncomfortable,” perhaps it feels like too much of a stretch.  In this case, the problem that’s “difficult” is mostly your attitude.
  3. It could mean that you are doing to have to do things that you find definitely distasteful or even abhorrent.  It’s not that you don’t have the energy or don’t want to do it, you hate the very idea of doing them!  In this case, the problem that’s “difficult” is your semantic reaction to the activity or activities that you are required to do.

 

Here we have a subjective human experience, one that we are calling— when things get difficult.   When that happens to you (or to one of your coaching clients), what do you do?  How do you typically and generally respond when things get difficult?  How does your client typically respond?  We all have our basic response patterns, do you know yours?  Do you like yours?  Would you like to update yours and develop a more mature, more robust, more effective and productive response pattern?  What about one of your clients— if that’s what they want, do you know how to coach it?

 

Siapa Saya?

Written by Mariani Ng Posted in Mariani Ng on Tuesday, 03 October 2017.

Siapa saya?

Seorang peserta training lari ke arah saya, lalu tepat di depan saya dia bertanya ‘siapa saya? Siapa nama saya?’ sambil menunjuk ke dirinya sendiri. Ekspresi wajahnya serius tampak kebingungan. Saya kaget, namun akhirnya tertawa sendiri setelah tahu bahwa dia ‘dikerjain’ oleh temannya dengan hipnotis.

 

Siapa saya?

Saya yakin kita semua pasti ingat nama diri masing-masing. Namun ternyata, adapula atribut lain yang ikut melekat bersamaan dengan kelekatan nama tersebut. Bila nama dilekatkan oleh kedua orangtua sejak lahir sebagai doa dan harapan untuk kemudian hari, atribut demi atribut kita lekatkan demi apa? Belum lagi atribut yang dilekatkan oleh orang lain, dalam rangka apa?

 

Ada satu keluarga 3 bersaudara, dimana ibu mereka selalu membandingkan anak sulung sebagai yang hebat, anak kedua perlu belajar dari si kakak untuk menjaga anak bungsu yang kurang mandiri. Dan kemudian atribut itupun melekat hingga dewasa, yang akhirnya si sulung tumbuh menjadi orang yang ‘hebat’ namun angkuh, anak bungsu terus mencari jati diri karena merasa kurang mandiri, sedangkan anak kedua malah tumbuh lebih dewasa dari kakak dan terus belajar dengan rendah hati. Kelekatan yang tidak disengaja, namun membekas dalam proses tumbuh kembang seorang manusia.

 

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